I read to learn. I also Google to learn. And today, I learned that I don’t know shit. Do you know how many quotes we use entirely wrong? A LOT. Everything I’ve ever known is basically a lie. I’m being dramatic. Lets begin…
“Great minds think alike.”
The Full Quote: “Great minds think alike, small minds rarely differ” or “Great minds think alike, and fools seldom differ.” It’s almost the same thing, but the fuller quote is much bitchier and I like it.
“CURIOSITY killed the cat.”
The Full Quote: “Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.” HOW BOW DAH!? Next time someone throws that crap quote in your face, you now have a comeback. Be curious, my friends!
“ROME wasn’t built in a day.”
The Full Quote: “Rome wasn’t built in a day, but it burnt in one.” Something great can easily be taken down. Womp Womp.
“WELL BEHAVED WOMEN RARELY MAKE HISTORY.”
This is the actual quote, but you’ll typically see it on Facebook with Marilyn Monroe’s name underneath. Like most of the memes made with her, this one is bullshit as well. Laurel Thatcher Ulrich said it. You may not know who she is, but you should, she teaches Women’s and American History at Harvard. Not only that, she has written oodles of books, including one published in 2007, titled ‘Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History‘.
“NO REST FOR THE WICKED.”
The Full Quote: “There is no peace, saith my God, to the wicked.” You can no longer use this as an excuse for being late because you didn’t get any rest due to all of your wickedness. You’re really telling people you’re trying to find inner peace.
“BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER.”
The Full Quote: “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” This is by far my favorite REAL quote. In laymen’s terms, just because someone is family, doesn’t mean they will be as loyal to you as a friend. In my own personal experience, I’ve learned that blood has absolutely nothing to do with how a person will treat you, respect you, or back you.
“NICE GUYS FINISH LAST.”
The Full Quote: “All nice guys. They’ll finish last.” Baseball hall of famer Leo Durocher had his words twisted and taken out of context. See that very important period in the quote in between “guys” and “they”? PUNCTUATION MATTERS.
“LET THEM EAT CAKE.”
The Full Quote: “If they have no bread, let them eat cake.” I’m going to burst your bubble, Marie Antoinette said neither of these things… I’m just as confused as you.
“THE BRITISH ARE COMING.”
The Full Quote: Paul Revere actually said “The Regulars are out.”
10. “I cannot tell a lie. It was I who chopped down the cherry tree.”
The Full Quote: Washington never said it. (I swear my history teacher said Lincoln chopped the tree down, anyone else remember this?) Anyways, WASHINGTON NEVER SAID IT. EVER. Parson Weems, Washington’s biographer made up crap to fill the pages of his book, this quote being one of them.